More Fun at the Job! (Originally from 11/24/2005)

Alright! My job blows. When I was hired I was told it is a slow time. And it is. (So slow that if I steal a pen, the company may have to file for bankruptcy... I stole 2 today) Anyway I was told it was slow and that I could take time off. They lied. I wanted to leave early so I called my boss who is apparently "working" from home today so he could get more done. I think he jacked off to www.teengirls.com all day. So I figure I can call him and say;

"Yo! I be peacin earlz Yo!"

and he'd be like

"COO!"

But to my dismay it went more like this

"Hey boss. Can I leave early"

and he said well

"I dunno hows the progress report looking, hows the graphic projects report looking, hows the verizon brochure looking, hows the stock shapes catalogue looking, hows the ......."

"It's all kinda blah. I'm stumped man I'm not really feeling "it"."

(By "it" what I meant to say was "making brochures of every goddamn novelty product we sell, or making fuckin catalogues that are gonna be outdated in 1.4 months, drawing some fuckin inflatable animal that has some fuckin stupid radio station logo on it, or sorting 400 fucking pictures of inflatable junk." [We have 14 fuckin pictures of a plain white pill bottle. Why you ask? Good question. They're from different angles but you cant fuckin tell cause its just white shiny super-nazi-secret fabric. {"How did zees frabreek geet made?""Nein! Ve dont talk about zat" GUNFIRE} It's just rubberized nylon you fucks anyone can make it.] Radio stations are fucked.)

"Did something happen at work?"

"No, I just..."

"Have a look at the stuff you got going on and give it a try."

"I have. I've been looking at it all day and I coming up with nothing.[Your vampiric shithole of a company and employees have drained all fuckin life out of me]"

"Okay. Well just give it another try."

"Alright"

I shut down my computer for the day 30 secs after this conversation.